Today, I choose gratitude.
I still have a stubborn, fibroid.
Although it’s greatly reduced in size.
I am still not at my IDEAL weight.
Or dress size….
But you know what?
I don’t care.
I don’t care about the number on the scale. I don’t care about stretch marks, flabby underarms, a tummy that hasn’t caught up with the rest of the 60 pounds that I HAVE lost and the inches that continue to fall away.
Wanna know why? Because caring about something obsessively, ESPECIALLY when I am working so hard DAILY on my self-care, nutrition and fitness, does NOT serve me. It actually steals my joy and takes me OUT of the momentum and flow that I have worked so hard to create. It keeps me from enjoying the little moments in life that I want to cherish.
I caught myself in this “bad mind behavior” about 3 weeks ago and I made a conscious choice to say, nope. Not staying in this space anymore.
I am grateful for how far I have come. I HAVE transformed habits and grown so much and I HAVE been shrinking too! :) 60 pounds! I sometimes spend so much time in the ideal future that I forget to be present in reality. The reality is… my CURRENT beautiful body is MOBILE. It gets me around and functions as it should. It went for an hour walk at 5 am today! It is able to use limbs to prepare food and then has the ability to consume food and absorb nutrients. I have eyes that can see, ears that can hear and thank the Lord, (aside from hacking my finger and getting stitches last week) I have nothing going on that renders me incapable of performing daily tasks. I am GRATEFUL for this body that I have been given and I am proud that I am taking REALLY friggen good care of it.
On top of that, I have confidence in my unique features that make me ME.
So friends, I don’t care about the nit-picky things that I don’t love anymore. I care about what I DO love. That is the entire person. All of me.
This body shaming we do to ourselves is the kind of thinking that breaks our spirit and can cause disorders and unhealthy patterns.
I am tired of...
“waiting until…” to have fun.
“Waiting until… “ to go shopping.
“Waiting until…” to go to the beach.
“Waiting until…” to chase that big dream.
Can you relate to this? I share vulnerably and do it scared because I believe that our mess can be the message that someone else is needing! Maybe you're needing to have this conversation with yourself too.
Let’s love ourselves just as we are, right now. :)
I hope you have a beautiful day with a positive perspective. <3